Creative Writing
Darkness is empty like a pitch-black alley way. I only wish to run from my insecurities that drown me in waves of desperation. Falling into a black hole; sadness suffocating my lungs, fog blinding me from the world above. I crave the light, the nostalgic idea of happiness. Resisting to let anger and frustration dominate my state of mind. Happiness is a paradise full of bliss and inspiration. Sadness is hell, it is numbing, a weary collapse of deep emotions. Through happiness, I see the dazzling sea,cooling waves crashing on the lustful shore. I see fresh gardens, the violet flowers blooming in sunlight. I desire a smile as endless as the universe that brightens and ignites every dull day. Craving a life of peace, sprinting towards the skies of freedom. Crisp wind, cool against my bones like a blizzard. Happiness hides deep beneath my skin, originating in my hopeful heart yearning to be felt. Anxiety misleads me, with the help of worry, away from my limitless days of sunshine. I have a phobia of existing yet never living; being followed by a dark rain cloud for the rest of my life. Looking past the beauty of the world and mistaking it for danger. Growing each day and learning to accept fate. Beginning a new chapter. Leaving the world in a cocoon, then being reborn as a beautiful butterfly. Evolving as a chameleon to leave my old ways, a life changing journey. Escaping the tunnels of extreme desperation, to seek my dreams.
Darkness is empty like a pitch-black alley way. I only wish to run from my insecurities that drown me in waves of desperation. Falling into a black hole; sadness suffocating my lungs, fog blinding me from the world above. I crave the light, the nostalgic idea of happiness. Resisting to let anger and frustration dominate my state of mind. Happiness is a paradise full of bliss and inspiration. Sadness is hell, it is numbing, a weary collapse of deep emotions. Through happiness, I see the dazzling sea,cooling waves crashing on the lustful shore. I see fresh gardens, the violet flowers blooming in sunlight. I desire a smile as endless as the universe that brightens and ignites every dull day. Craving a life of peace, sprinting towards the skies of freedom. Crisp wind, cool against my bones like a blizzard. Happiness hides deep beneath my skin, originating in my hopeful heart yearning to be felt. Anxiety misleads me, with the help of worry, away from my limitless days of sunshine. I have a phobia of existing yet never living; being followed by a dark rain cloud for the rest of my life. Looking past the beauty of the world and mistaking it for danger. Growing each day and learning to accept fate. Beginning a new chapter. Leaving the world in a cocoon, then being reborn as a beautiful butterfly. Evolving as a chameleon to leave my old ways, a life changing journey. Escaping the tunnels of extreme desperation, to seek my dreams.
Personal Narrative
Milestones
I feel pleasure in thousands of people judging me. “Hi everyone”; I said to a mini device that was set on record about three feet away from me. Taylor Swift was singing her hit song “You’re Not Sorry” softly in the background. I stood as an awkward thirteen year old girl next to my window sill and began to speak. The words came out naturally. The strange thing was that I was talking to a camera, yet it felt so normal.
At the age of ten, I discovered Youtube. I fell in love with the whole concept of diverse people from all over the globe making videos and uploading them for the rest of the world to see. I was intrigued by the fact that the people making videos were just ordinary people with normal lives. They were not celebrities that I had seen countless times before. It was like discovering a whole new world. It gave me a sense of confidence and I thought, “Wow, maybe I could do this too.” I loved being both behind the camera, and in front of it. Editing videos was another one of my hobbies that I wanted to gain more experience in. I had so many ideas that I wished to share with the world.
In June 2012, I decided to make a Youtube channel where I would upload videos all about beauty, fashion, and confidence for girls all over the world. Over the course of a year, thousands of people from all over the world had become my biggest supporters. I have communicated with people on the other side of the country on a daily basis. I have befriended girls that live across the globe because we all shared similar passions. Hours of my time have been consumed by figuring out how to work with different editing softwares to compose unique videos. Every encouraging comment I received on a video reassured me that what I loved to do had meaning and value.
It might have been the hours I spent planning and editing my videos, or the minutes I spent talking to my camera about my favorite fashion trends, but I was inspired to pursue a career in the fashion industry. The world of fashion is one that I have always found myself interested in. My early teenage years consisted of reading countless fashion magazines and observing style videos made by other Youtubers. I realized that fashion is a creative outlet for so many people out there, including me. With fashion, comes personality and self-confidence.
Growing up, my parents never understood why I did not want to be a nurse, or a lawyer, or an engineer. They always told me that in any other industry, the chances of becoming prosperous were slim. I have come to understand that it is not easy to make it in the fashion industry but with hard work anything is possible. I aspire to pursue a career in fashion as a stylist for celebrities. Many beauty and fashion vloggers that I have watched on Youtube for years have become highly successful. They are the ones who have inspired me to work diligently towards the career I desire.
For me, a simple, yet unusual hobby turned into so much more. It is strange to think back on how this all began. I did not have a clue what I wanted to be when I grew up before I started making Youtube videos. Once I began uploading video, after video, I knew I had found my passion along the way. Youtube has opened many doors and opportunities for me at only sixteen years old. Although my career choice may not be the path that my parents had sketched out for me, it is the one that I believe, will allow me to excel and continue to grow into the person I was meant to be.
Milestones
I feel pleasure in thousands of people judging me. “Hi everyone”; I said to a mini device that was set on record about three feet away from me. Taylor Swift was singing her hit song “You’re Not Sorry” softly in the background. I stood as an awkward thirteen year old girl next to my window sill and began to speak. The words came out naturally. The strange thing was that I was talking to a camera, yet it felt so normal.
At the age of ten, I discovered Youtube. I fell in love with the whole concept of diverse people from all over the globe making videos and uploading them for the rest of the world to see. I was intrigued by the fact that the people making videos were just ordinary people with normal lives. They were not celebrities that I had seen countless times before. It was like discovering a whole new world. It gave me a sense of confidence and I thought, “Wow, maybe I could do this too.” I loved being both behind the camera, and in front of it. Editing videos was another one of my hobbies that I wanted to gain more experience in. I had so many ideas that I wished to share with the world.
In June 2012, I decided to make a Youtube channel where I would upload videos all about beauty, fashion, and confidence for girls all over the world. Over the course of a year, thousands of people from all over the world had become my biggest supporters. I have communicated with people on the other side of the country on a daily basis. I have befriended girls that live across the globe because we all shared similar passions. Hours of my time have been consumed by figuring out how to work with different editing softwares to compose unique videos. Every encouraging comment I received on a video reassured me that what I loved to do had meaning and value.
It might have been the hours I spent planning and editing my videos, or the minutes I spent talking to my camera about my favorite fashion trends, but I was inspired to pursue a career in the fashion industry. The world of fashion is one that I have always found myself interested in. My early teenage years consisted of reading countless fashion magazines and observing style videos made by other Youtubers. I realized that fashion is a creative outlet for so many people out there, including me. With fashion, comes personality and self-confidence.
Growing up, my parents never understood why I did not want to be a nurse, or a lawyer, or an engineer. They always told me that in any other industry, the chances of becoming prosperous were slim. I have come to understand that it is not easy to make it in the fashion industry but with hard work anything is possible. I aspire to pursue a career in fashion as a stylist for celebrities. Many beauty and fashion vloggers that I have watched on Youtube for years have become highly successful. They are the ones who have inspired me to work diligently towards the career I desire.
For me, a simple, yet unusual hobby turned into so much more. It is strange to think back on how this all began. I did not have a clue what I wanted to be when I grew up before I started making Youtube videos. Once I began uploading video, after video, I knew I had found my passion along the way. Youtube has opened many doors and opportunities for me at only sixteen years old. Although my career choice may not be the path that my parents had sketched out for me, it is the one that I believe, will allow me to excel and continue to grow into the person I was meant to be.
Collaborize
#1- Exit Through the Gift Shop
The film Exit Through the Giftshop was an existentialist satire in the sense that it could have easily all been set-up and directed by the very intelligent and known street artist, Banksy(who was also featured in the film) as a social experiment to ridicule how people in society can be so easily controlled. I feel like this movie was intended to be moot. Banksy and the other film producers wanted to leave people in an unresolved state. For example, after the movie ended, it left me wondering if there was a greater purpose for this film other than just showing the lives of street artists and of how the french-man, Thierry Guetta became successful after becoming known as, street artist, “Mr. Brainwash.” After reading the two articles, it really altered my view on what this film was aiming to point out as an existentialist satire. I realized that the film brought up some interesting questions and points. Does all art have to have meaning? Of course not. And if it does, then that meaning is whatever the viewer wants it to be, or whatever he/she sees it as. The value of art is essentially determined by the buyers, the people in society, and those streets artist in the film like Banksy and Shepard Fairey, they knew that. They were smart guys because they knew that because their street art was becoming so popular by the people who were honestly just bandwagons and trend-followers, their art would make huge profits in the marketing industry. When you get to a point where doing what you love is bound to make you millions of dollars, its just like “ well, why not? “ This isn’t an opportunity most people would pass up. One point that I remember from our discussion in class today that really stuck with me was that something that many people in the marketing business have realized about society, and that is; “ We can’t make sense of the people, but we can control them.” I believe that this whole film, whether it was a social experiment or not, sort of showed how dumb people can be by placing so much value on something that has absolutely no meaning.
#1- Exit Through the Gift Shop
The film Exit Through the Giftshop was an existentialist satire in the sense that it could have easily all been set-up and directed by the very intelligent and known street artist, Banksy(who was also featured in the film) as a social experiment to ridicule how people in society can be so easily controlled. I feel like this movie was intended to be moot. Banksy and the other film producers wanted to leave people in an unresolved state. For example, after the movie ended, it left me wondering if there was a greater purpose for this film other than just showing the lives of street artists and of how the french-man, Thierry Guetta became successful after becoming known as, street artist, “Mr. Brainwash.” After reading the two articles, it really altered my view on what this film was aiming to point out as an existentialist satire. I realized that the film brought up some interesting questions and points. Does all art have to have meaning? Of course not. And if it does, then that meaning is whatever the viewer wants it to be, or whatever he/she sees it as. The value of art is essentially determined by the buyers, the people in society, and those streets artist in the film like Banksy and Shepard Fairey, they knew that. They were smart guys because they knew that because their street art was becoming so popular by the people who were honestly just bandwagons and trend-followers, their art would make huge profits in the marketing industry. When you get to a point where doing what you love is bound to make you millions of dollars, its just like “ well, why not? “ This isn’t an opportunity most people would pass up. One point that I remember from our discussion in class today that really stuck with me was that something that many people in the marketing business have realized about society, and that is; “ We can’t make sense of the people, but we can control them.” I believe that this whole film, whether it was a social experiment or not, sort of showed how dumb people can be by placing so much value on something that has absolutely no meaning.
Spring Production Reflection
For our spring production, Street Scene, I was head of the costuming group. Coming into this production, I knew that costuming was going to be somewhat stressful but also enjoyable for me because I absolutely love fashion and anything that has to do with styling clothing pieces. I had never done anything like this before so I was very grateful that two of the former costumers were always there to answer my questions and give me tips on how I should organize our daily tasks. My role as the lead costumer was to keep everybody else in the costuming group on task, help all the actors out on any wardrobe malfunctions they had, and to make sure all the costumes were taken care of and placed back in their assigned spots correctly.
My first individual responsibility was to assign specific daily tasks to each member of the costuming group, including myself. Each day that we met during production period, we would have something new to accomplish whether it was researching attire from the 1920’s, contacting local thrift stores, making lists and logs, or having the actors try on costume possibilities, etc. There was always something that had to be done. Another one of my responsibilities was to always be present whenever our director, Clark, needed a costumer at rehearsals after school or on weekends. I was responsible for taking down notes on his detailed costume directions for the actors in the play. Lastly, I was responsible for cleaning up after the actors got out of their costumes. It was my job to make sure all the costumes we borrowed and rented were taken care of and placed accordingly on their labeled hangers.
I can definitely say this role did become challenging at some points. One of the main challenges was looking for specific pieces for the actors’ costumes and having a hard time finding them for reasonable prices at thrift stores and vintage boutiques. For example, it took us a while to find Kiyah a pair of shoes that would fit her comfortably. Another challenge was keeping all the costumes neat and in their places after many people just left them laying around after they had taken them off. Dealing with some people who were disrespectful backstage was difficult for me as well but I managed to get my job done.
I believe that I have grown in so many ways throughout this spring production process. Clearly, being backstage as a costuming leader was new to me since I had been just an extra in our fall production. As an extra I did not have nearly as many responsibilities as I did this semester. I have become more independent throughout this process. Even though I was not doing costuming alone, I gained a greater sense of self-confidence. I also learned that despite the challenges and stress I faced as a costumer, at the end of the day, I completely loved it. It allowed me to somewhat experience how the fashion industry works, and I know for sure now that I want to strive for a career in fashion.
I have also gained several transferable skills during this production period. For one, I have learned how to be a leader and how to be responsible for a group of people. I’ve also practiced making a flexible schedule work in order to manage the completion of daily tasks. This will help me in future jobs because I will be able to manage my time wisely, whether I’m working independently or not, and get tasks completed. As a leader in costuming, I practiced the skill of communicating with others and asking questions, as well as answering them. Communication is an extremely important skill in the real world, so I know the skill will benefit me.
After reading over the rubric, I would hope to receive an A as an overall production grade. I gave myself an A for work ethic because I think I did a good job at keeping an open mind though the process of searching for and choosing the costumes. I was always glad to listen to anything that the other costumers suggested. I also gave myself an A in productivity because I was always attempting to complete a task rather than just sitting down and wasting time. As for initiative and communication I think I would receive an A as well because each time we met during production period, I was motivated and ready to get things done. It was exciting to find out what came next in the process. I am very proud to say that if this were an actual job, I would be given a raise or a promotion because of my willingness to work hard and be there when I was needed. Finally, this experience did teach me a few things about myself. I learned that I frequently put others before myself. I like to help people with whatever they need. I also learned that I have quite a bit of patience for people because I never became angry with anyone, and that makes me happy. As I said before, this process reminded me of why I loved fashion so much in the first place and why I’ve always wanted to pursue a career in the fashion industry.
I am so happy with the way Street Scene came together. When I was watching the play on one of the show days I became sort of emotional because it was amazing to see everything come to life; from the script, to the set, to the costumes and everything else. I feel so lucky to be a part of Nueva and I’m already looking forward to what next year has in store.
1 Page Analytical Essay
F. Scott Fitzgerald is an American author known for his incredible use of symbolism in his short stories and novels. He was a writer living in the period of time known as “The Lost Generation.” He wrote his short story “The Lost Decade” just one year before he passed away from a heart-attack in the year 1940 at the age of 44. Fitzgerald had always struggled with himself as a writer, and unfortunately died, thinking that he was nothing but a failure. In his final years Fitzgerald had also become a clinical alcoholic. In the story “The Lost Decade” we see the use of a character in the story made to symbolize and reflect upon his personal struggles with alcohol during the “lost” years of his life.
The short story follows two men, going to lunch on an afternoon in New York, by the names of Louis Trimble and Orrison Brown. As they conversate, Orrison learns that Mr. Trimble had been away for ten years and although he does not know where he has been, he assumes that Mr. Trimble had been “in a prison or an insane asylum.” The story goes on as Orrison observes Mr. Trimble’s words and body language. Towards the end of the story, Mr. Trimble states, “But I was taken drunk that year--- every-which-way-drunk. So I never saw it before now.” This gave Orrison the hint that Mr. Trimble had been drunk during those ten years of his life that he said he had lost. It becomes clear that Mr. Trimble was a man who had been an alcoholic for a decade of this life. He felt like he had missed out on a portion of his life. All he wanted to do in the story was observe how things had changed since he’d last seen them as a sober man.
Perhaps Fitzgerald uses Mr. Trimble as a symbol of himself and his personal struggles by reflecting on how he felt during the time of his heavy use of alcohol. Fitzgerald thought of himself as a completely different person than when he was in his alcoholic phase. Life became a blur to him after being intoxicated for so long. Fitzgerald was not only struggling with an alcohol problem but he had depression as well and seeing all the other great writers of the time succeed did not help his self-esteem. He did not realize what a phenomenal writer he truly was.
The use of symbolism was nothing new for Fitzgerald. In his famous american novel, The Great Gatsby he used the colors green and yellow; both to represent deeper meanings. This is what made Fitzgerald such a thoughtful, lyrical writer. It is why he is named one of the most important writers of the twentieth century. This story, The Lost Decade is significant because it is relatable to the lives of people living now in this day and time. It is as an example of how some people live their lives mindlessly and they end up in these terrible situations that cause them to lose who they are. People go day to day without noticing the damage they are doing to themselves. They become comfortable in a life of addiction. They do not realize how much valuable time they are losing because they take it all for granted. You can see Fitzgerald’s feelings of regret through Mr. Trimble’s words when he claims that the waiter in the restaurant would not remember him because ten years had passed by. In a sense Fitzgerald uses this short story and the character, Mr. Trimble, as a warning sign to people reading. In a part of the story, Mr. Trimble says that he wants to be around the young people because he wants to see how things have changed with the new generation. He does not want his audience to feel the regret and pain that he felt after realizing how much of his life he had missed due to his struggles with alcoholism.
3-4 Page Analytical Paper
The Acceptance of Coping
Fiction has the power to allow people to connect with characters while also giving insight into the human experience. Through character development and conflicts that arise, fiction can bring characters and their experiences to life.
James Baldwin was born and raised in Harlem, New York and became known as one of the greatest writers of his generation. In his powerful and empathetic story, “Sonny’s Blues”, Baldwin writes of two brothers who come to understand and accept each other for who they are and what they love to do. They learn each other’s ways of coping with the difficult factors in their lives. But it is not until the conclusion of the story that this resolution occurs. James Baldwin explores universal themes through the lives of fictional characters, and he draws his readers into their experiences. He uses the ways that the people in Harlem coped with their struggles as an example of how, despite their differences, they still came to understand and accept each other.
This story takes readers through a series of flashbacks, and with the use of allusions and motifs, Baldwin guides his readers through the mind of the narrator. While Sonny’s Blues is told through the memories and experiences of the narrator, Sonny’s Brother, it is about Sonny and their relationship. Sonny is a man who loves music more than anything in the world. It is his escape from his reality and personal struggles. Music is not Sonny’s only addiction though. He struggles with the constant need for a deadly drug known as heroin. For many musicians and artists of the time, this drug was used to spark their creativity and put them at a needed high. The narrator watches his brother cope with his struggles in such an unhealthy way but refuses to simply listen to what Sonny wants or how he feels. In a memory of Sonny’s teenage years, the narrator says, “I didn’t like the way he carried himself, loose and dreamlike all the time, and I didn’t like his friends, and his music seemed to be merely an excuse for the life he led.” When he says this, the narrator has no idea how much music means to Sonny. Music is Sonny’s pain relieving therapy, and the narrator does not accept that Sonny’s way of dealing with pain is not a waste of time.
The tone at the end of the story reflects an epiphany within the narrator. It is uplifting and powerful. You can feel a change in tone at the end that was not there throughout the beginning of the story. Towards the end of the story, Sonny invites his brother to come and watch him perform with his fellow musicians at a Jazz Club. As the musicians start playing their instruments, the narrator notices how much the other people in the room are enjoying the music and how he has now entered Sonny’s own little world. As the narrator watches the way Sonny strikes the piano, he has a moment of realization and says, “ I was yet aware that this was only a moment, that the world waited outside, as hungry as a tiger, and that trouble stretched above us, longer than the sky.” This line is significant because he feels that in this moment, everything is okay. Danger and struggles await him outside but he has come to accept the fact that life is what it is. He is engaged by the simple sound of the emotionally heavy music and he begins to accept the harsh realities of life that he and his loved ones have endured. He accepts his brother for who he is and for what he loves to do. Hearing the music and watching his brother play with the other musicians brings the narrator to life.
James Baldwin uses his prose to allow the characters to become real people in the minds of audiences. His amazing imagery puts pictures into the reader’s mind of what is going on. In the very end of the story when he writes about the glass of milk and scotch on the piano, he symbolizes the joining together of youth and maturity. It is as if the narrator and Sonny finally meet in the middle and understand each other and their individual ways of coping.
The way Baldwin uses music as a motif in the story is interesting because he uses it as a sense of hope, as if it was the music that caused the narrator’s epiphany and self-realization. Music represents a hope for a new beginning of Sonny and his brother’s relationship. The narrator’s flashbacks allow readers to relate because when people remember the past, they often do not remember an entire scene at once or in any sort of chronological order. They remember pieces of what happened and the memories play back in their minds randomly. This is exactly how Baldwin’s prose works in the flashback parts of the story, which makes it easy to feel empathetic towards the narrator and what he is going through.
Baldwin’s prose, emphasizes the narrators’ big epiphany, as well as Sonny’s final feelings of being accepted by his brother. Sonny never gives up what he was passionate about, even though the people closest to him were the ones who had not been supportive.
This goes to show an important lesson in human experience, which is to always do what makes you happy, without listening to the opinions of others. If all people listened to those who tried to bring them down, there would not be as many successful or happy people in the world. Usually the other people who do not support you end up being proved wrong. Nobody should be discouraged to be themselves by the pressure from people around them because everybody has different ways of expressing themselves and making themselves happy. Just as people have things that make them happy, they also have weaknesses and ways to deal with their suffering. Some safer than others. All we must do is accept who they are and be somebody they can always count on for support and stability. In the end James Baldwin’s overarching theme came to be that supporting and accepting the decisions of the ones we love may not always be easy, but it is the right thing to do.